Saturday, April 6, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: F is for The Fed Ex Guy



The other day, I happened to come home early and the Fed Ex truck arrived *squee*
To not seem overly impatient, I gave him time to do his thing... Went inside the house and put my purse down and whatnot.  I come back out and he's still in the truck...  (???)  Finally I walk up to the truck and it turns out he was standing inside the truck waiting for me because the dogs were out. :/
I'm now kinda curious about how long he would have waited in the truck.  What if no one was home?  Yes, the dogs are obnoxious.  They get over excited when anyone comes to visit them and in turn they will run up to you like a fan begging for an autograph while barking their fool heads off.  So I guess it's the running at you while barking part that kind of puts him off.  So basically, my dogs are aholes and not able to express their true intent accurately.  (See C is for Communication)
But could he have given me the heads' up?  Maybe honk his horn or yell out "hello?"
He should totally hang out with the UPS guy one time as the UPS guy totally gets our obnoxious dogs.  Sometimes he has dog biscuits for them.  Which could also be a reason the dogs are beside themselves to see a man in a truck- FREE FOOD!!! 
*cringe*
Luckily, everything worked out.  The Fed Ex guy was able to do his job and leave with the same amount of flesh he arrived in.  And I got my new awesome mattress topper!  OMG, it's like sinking into the most comfortable quick sand EVER! 



31 comments:

  1. I love your humorous posts so I'm nominating you for the Liebster Award! Go to my site http://vickipaulus.blogspot.com/ to learn more and review the eleven questions for you to answer.

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  2. Thank you Vicki!!! The Good Twin and I love to crack each other up and doing this blog together has been awesome :)

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  3. I had a similar situation but the Fed Ex Guy actually walked into my yard. I heard my dog barking, ran outside & caught the guy with his clip board down by his feet trying to protect himself from my dog. Actually, I think the only reason my dark was barking at him was because he absolutely hates people who wear boots and hats. I felt bad but my dog was just doin' his job:)

    Jaime at Awakenings and Reflections

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    1. LOL!!! Poor Fed Ex Guy didn't know your dog was a fashion critic ;)
      "You want to come on my property wearing boots and a hat? It's on!!!!"

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  4. They have plenty of dog biting stories that pass around at the shop to make them leery eventho most dogs are just curious.

    Now I'm curious about the mattress topper (sounds cozy)


    moondustwriter's Poetry nice to meet you thru A to Z

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    1. That's very true. Better safe than sorry?

      Oh and the mattress topper is divine! It's a 4 inch foam Heaven :)

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  5. I don't blame him! Dogs freak me out, too. Also, UPS drivers are the best. I love mine.

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    1. Awww! Sorry to hear that! Dogs freak me out if they are growling and running at me at the same time. Luckily that's only happened once or twice in my life.

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  6. I love your blog! The banner had me tearing up with laughter :) Seems like the guy would be used to dog and have a game plan...other than taking a break in the back until you came to fetch him. Maybe he was afraid you were raising werewolves...

    Happy Blogging!
    Kaye Draper at Write Me

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    1. Thank you! Heather @ IBB designed our layout, banners, siggies and she absolutely rocks! :D

      OMg- now you've got me laughing, picturing the "broken down race horse and the "overly stuffed sausage" as werewolves!

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  7. Aw, your poor puppies! Judged by the FedEx guy. Tsk tsk.

    At least you were able to sort it all out and then luxuriate with your mattress topper.

    How does that get delivered, anyway? One big, long box? Is it rolled up into a tube? Hm.

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    1. Hey Amy!
      They roll it up like sod and then shink wrap it to get all the air out. So yes, one big, not so long but definitely heavy box!

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  8. I love your writing! Your dogs remind me of mine! This big 'ole 105 pound of fur looks scary but really.... just be prepared to have your face licked clean!!
    Connie
    A to Z buddy
    Peanut Butter and Whine

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    1. Oh absolutely! Yes, the "broken down race horse" has a scarry deep bark, but the fact that he has to hobble to get to you should let you know you're most likely gonna make it out alive. In my experience, smaller dogs are more likely to bite. They have the whole short man disorder and like to rule the roost. Big dogs just want to be lap hounds :)

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  9. Wait a minute, the Fed ex guy was afraid of the two little puff ball dogs that can't weigh more than 25lbs wet? Told you to name them Cujo and Killer!

    Comfy mattress pad...someone you know and love has a birthday coming up...just sayin'! ;)

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    1. Bird breath is big. And yes, sausage is a small dog, but girth-wise he may be pushing the 25 lbs while dry ;)

      She does! So which side of the bed should I put yours on? *laughs and ducks*

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  10. There is something about those fedex and ups trucks that set off the doggy alarms in the entire neighborhood.

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    1. This is true! They are like a balance limit warning on your credit card ;)

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    2. "trust me, she doesn't need more stuff! Unless it's doggy treats, if it's doggy treats you can come here."

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  11. Both dogs I have owned always went after the mailman, as if they could sense he did not like them. They were both pretty big dogs but his biggest risk was excessive slobbering.

    I noticed that on the Fed Ex trucks it now says "Ground."

    I am so glad they added that critical information-otherwise I would have been so confused.

    I wonder if the planes say "air."

    But what about when they are on the runway?

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    1. LOL!!! I think the planes do say Air! They should add "sometimes" after the label :)

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  12. I guess people in delivery jobs learn early on to be wary of dogs, especially ones that bark. There's a reason dogs and mailmen are such a cliche....

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  13. Hey your blog is great...How do I sign up for the A-Z Challenge?? I read the instructions and they say that the list is closed??

    Help me I want to join the fun!

    PLU from SSF

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    1. Hi Don!
      Yes, sadly, the challenge is closed. The Good Twin was able to get us registered right before the deadline. Hopefully you can be part of next year's event?

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  14. The UPS guy sure is innovative. You post made me imagine a short story with UPS as the protagonist and FedEx as the antagonist. -Belinda [A - Z participant; hope to see you over MROP soon].

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    1. LOL! Yes, the UPS guy definitely knows the sure way to a dog's heart :)

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  15. Heather, you just have a way of telling a story... you're too damn funny!

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Thoughts?