Friday, September 7, 2012

My Groupon Addiction gets worse...

The Groupon Guide to: Body Language

Thanks to body language, you don't have to hear someone's hot, breathy voice in order to learn how they're feeling. Know what's on everyone's mind just by looking at them with this guide to nonverbal communication:

Position: Head hanging down
Meaning: Shame about having lost a basketball game or never having learned to properly diaper a baby

Position: Arms crossed
Meaning: Self-conscious about something that looks like nozzles on otherwise normal chest

Position: Chin up
Meaning: Humiliated to look down at the hands that have touched so many strangers' hair

Position: Legs crossed
Meaning: Desperately trying to control the powerful leg muscles that so desperately want to kick down a door, just once, to see how it feels

Position: Balled up, quivering, screaming at the slightest hint of noise or light
Meaning: In a fit of joyful awe at all of the wonderful things the world has to offer


  1. *In a fit of joyful awe* Yep! Pretty much sums up everything! LOL!

  2. In Catholic school we weren't supposed to cross our legs, just our ankles. Leg crossing was allegedly a sex invite, which never made sense to me. I would think that leg crossing was like closing that to speak. Had I known it was really a desire to kick that crap out of something, I may have gone rogue on the nuns!

    But the balled up, quivering being a sign of joyful awe just made me feel a whole lot better!

  3. LOL!!! I think it was more that leg crossing makes your skirt a little shorter and for some lucky girls also manualy stimulates them.

  4. Damn! Those are probably the same girls who are married to awesome men and eat whatever they want without gaining an ounce! Do you have a spell for that?